What if?
by Jansen Friedh
Summary: What if Jansen had made it before Lirum had died, he wonders? Jansen x Lirum-y.


**UPDATE:** Story be edited.  
**A/N: **Jansen x Lirum. Yum.

Anyways, Lost Odyssey not mine.

* * *

Jansen sighed.

The two kids were crying. They lost their mother. She was…so young, so beautiful, even in her illness. It shocked him how a life could extinguish at such a young age.

_He_ could die soon, too.

As the coffin sailed out into the ocean, he wondered. Wondered if he would go young, too. Kaim and Seth couldn't. They were the lucky ones. Or, were they? To witness so many deaths, either strangers or family. Kaim, apparently, had lost his daughter twice, and hadn't seen his wife since the first time. Seth, well, he didn't really know who she'd lost, but she had to had lost someone at some point.

It was sad, but the only people who would care if he died or not, were those three girls in Uhra. Even so, they wanted Seth to go with them next time. Seth! Of all people!

Jansen walked up to the edge of the water. He stared at the speck of the coffin, and just watched it drift away. Maybe, if he had got there earlier, had actually tried and travel the world, he would have made it before Lirum had died.

Cooke and Mack's father wasn't seen for awhile. What if…if he did make it to her earlier, would there have been something there? Even it was just a friendship, Cooke and Mack might've had a father-like figure.

Or, if something did start with Lirum, would he just continue to be his old play-boy self? If he did, what would Lirum had though? Or Cooke or Mack? Would he just abandon them, and go back to Uhra?

Jansen shook his head. He was thinking, not in a sexual way, about a girl he had only met for a couple of minutes, and hadn't even talked to. What _was_ Jansen coming to?

He headed back behind Kaim and the rest of the group. He had no place standing at the Oceanside, thinking about some girl he had just met and wondering if there was something there. Especially since it was Kaim's - one of the people he kind of considered as a friend - daughter.

He could, of course, find another girl he thought about in such a way.

But, how did he really feel about Lirum? What had sparked this interest in her?

Thinking about it, he knew.

It had been locked away like Kaim and Seth's memories had been locked away.

But it was just this one memory, not many.

* * *

_"Jansen, you're going to help her, and that's final."_

_  
"But Mo-om!" Jansen whined. He always hated helping the next-door neighbour. Brigitte, her name was. One of the reasons why his mom made him go help out was because of her child. _

_  
"Brigitte's just a baby herself," his mother would explain. "We should help her out as much as possible. Plus, she's your age, you might be able to make a friend!"_

_  
It was true about Brigitte still being young. She was only 17, and her boyfriend had left her as soon as he found out she was pregnant._

_  
The other reason why Jansen had to help the girl out was she was confined to her bed. She was dying. Jansen had to give Brigitte her medicine while his mom took care of the baby._

_  
Jansen knocked three times at the door. He went in as soon as he was sure that the girl had shouted - or tried to shout, at least- at him to come in._

_  
"Morning, Brigitte," Jansen said with a grim smile. Brigitte gave him a curt nod and began to stare at the wall. "Ready for your medicine?" Jansen asked._

_  
"I won't be needing my medicine today, Jansen."_

_"Why? Are you feeling better or something?"_

_"Nope. I think today's the day…that I'll move on to the next life." She turned her head to look at him. "And before I go, I have to tell you something." Jansen gave her a puzzled look._

_  
"First of all, even if you are gonna die, you're taking your medicine. And since when did you want to talk to me?"_

_  
"I'm not taking my medicine, Jansen. That's final. But please, listen to me. It's important." Jansen sighed._

_  
"Fine. What do you want?"_

_  
"After these past few months…you and your mother have been so kind to me. Don't give me that look, even with your attitude I've still appreciated what you've done. And…I've been thinking…about what you mean to me." Jansen gulped. He knew what was coming next. "You really mean a lot to me, Jansen." She began to blush. "And, as my dying wish…I'd like you to -" _

_  
Before Brigitte finished, she she sat up as she began a coughing fit. Jansen moved in to help her, but she shook her head and stopped._

_  
"I'd like you to…tell me how you feel about me, in return. I need to know before I go. I don't want to spend my afterlife worrying about what I meant to you." She rested her head on her pillow. 'Well, this is great," Jansen thought. 'She's gonna frigging haunt me if I don't tell her. And…if I don't tell her what she wants to hear, which is that I'm totally in love with her, then…well, she'll probably still haunt me. Crap. I really hate dying people.' Jansen sighed._

_  
"Fine, I'll tell you.. I -" Brigitte began her coughing fit again. Except, it was worse than last time. Jansen could see blood trickling down the side of her hand. "B-Brigitte? Are you…" Jansen stared wide-eyed at her. He had no clue what to do. He'd never been in a situation like this._

_  
"Jansen.." she started, and coughed again. "Tell me…before…I…go…" Her eyes began to close._

_  
"NO! Brigitte! Don't go! Please! I -" And as her eyes closed, Jansen realized why he never had long fights with his mother about going to help her. Why he came, even if he was still tired, with out his mother to drag him out of the house. He loved her._

_  
And now she was gone, and she wasn't coming back. She was a star in the sky now, was what he was told as a kid, to what happens to people who pass on._

_  
She'd still be watching him, though._

* * *

_'That's why I felt that way about that chick? You've __got to be kidding me._

_Well, it does make sense...but it was ten years ago! I shouldn't have felt that way about her, especially because..well, I just met her and all..._' Jansen thought.

He sighed. '_Maybe_,' he thought, '_I could spin around and go back in time and tell Lirum how I felt! W-wait..the guys would think that's weird, me spinning around at a funeral...that's out of it._

_But, I need to tell her. Somehow. She'll find out._"

* * *

After the funeral, and after everyone had fallen asleep, Jansen got up from the make-shift bed he was laying in and went to the desk. He began to write on a piece of paper. After he had written his letter, he put it in a bottle and went to the shore to send it off.

* * *

_Lirum,_

_If you receive this in your place in the stars, I'm glad._  
_When I first saw your face, you reminded me of someone I had met long ago. I know, it sounds stupid, but it's true. She was seventeen, she was single, she was dying and she had a kid. I had to take care of her, and the day of her death, I came close to telling her how I felt. She died before I did, though, and I tried my best to forget about her, and I did. And, when I saw your face yesterday, I remembered how I felt about her.  
I guess...because of that memory, I started to feel that way about you, too, even if we didn't talk to each other, and even if we had looked at each other, if only for a moment.  
I really do hope you receive this from up in the stars. You're lucky to get off this earth before the rest of us, considering what's gonna start happening._

_- Jansen (one of your dad's...erm, friends.)_

* * *

**END**

* * *


End file.
